very late saturday night and life has hit me with all its force im trying to digest the fact that friend of mine hung himself last night and i still cant believe that it is real you selfish prick!i mean how could you!how fucking could you!im basically just thinking out loud at the moment pretty much fully schnapped but i dont give a fuck at this point i just dont get how things could lead to that. i mean this guy was cool a person that i would confide in and ask for advice and he would always have time for me and clear my head, i dont even know what im trying to say really i just....i just...i dont know..why?i mean ive been down i mean way down in holes that i thought i couldn't climb out of but you hang on....you know?you fucking hang on!i mean thats all anyone does in life really we are all just hanging on at its toughest moments when you think there's no way out you hang on! you fucking hang on! because people are counting on you and people love you, im really fucking pissed off right now and probably shouldn't even be writing anything, this is the second person that i know who has done this in as many years, and when i see you fuckers when i leave this earth you both will get a kicking that you will never!ever!forget! if when i get there you can even show your face so f.u.